October 21, 2016

when meeting celebrities

Who here is a TLC fan?

Erm, let me specify---I'm talking about TLC the tv channel, not the I don't want no scrub TLC (However, I should also note that I also don't want no scrub either...)

The Learning Channel! Listen, I haven't had cable in about five years, and the only time I ever get sad about it is when a new Duggars special is on. Or when it's pumpkin patch season and Little People, Big World is on. Or when I see that The Little Couple's kids are growing up and I can't watch them be cute in their Halloween costumes. 

I also not-so-secretly love all the scandal involved around all the TLC stars. I learn a lot from The Learning Channel, like what not to wear AND what not to do in life. Read sign up for an Ashley Madison account. 

Basically life without cable TLC is hard. Really hard. 

Now if you're a true TLC fan (aren't we all?!), then you know that Bill and Jen from The Little Couple live in Houston. Hey! Guess what? I live in Houston, too! Jen works in the Med Center. Hey! Guess what! Freddie works in the Med Center, too! I've asked him one or eight times what he would do if he ever passed Jen while walking through the buildings. 

His response: who?

^^ that guy. How does he live life so unaware of the good things like TLC celebrities? I'll tell you what I would do if I saw Jennifer Arnold while walking around the Med Center----I would freak the freak out. Insert a stronger word choice on that second freak there, if you would like. 

Okay, so now that you have the necessary background information (my love for TLC = big),  I can tell you my favorite from this week!

Yes, you read that correctly. I am showing up to Five Freaking, Fantastically Fun Favorites on Friday with only ONE favorite. It's a good one. 

I went to the post office on Tuesday with one goal: get in and out as quickly as possible. I come from a small town in Georgia where going to the post office is like going to your old best friend's house and chatting with his or her granddad. The old men that work there are the cutest. They remember little details about your day, ask how your family is doing, make jokes about the stamp designs, and make the entire experience fun. As fun as a visit to the post office can be. Apparently post offices around the country do not all run like the post office in Newnan, Georgia runs, so I try to make my visits really quick so that I don't get homesick for my fake granddads back home (Horace, I'm talking to you)

So there I was quickly packing a box with lots of tissue paper when the door opened, and someone walked in. 

Here's the part of the story where I will tell it through GIFs because don't lie, GIFs do it better. 

I tiredly glanced over to the door.

When within .3 seconds of that tired glance I realized I was looking at Bill from The Little Couple. 

Me when I looked around and no one in the post office was giving a bleep about this celebrity. 

When I had to do a double take to make sure I wasn't hallucinating since no one else cared. Yep, it was Bill.

And finally, when I froze and the only thing I could think to do was be a stalker, grab my phone, and take this picture as he walked out. Don't worry, I covered it really well by pretending I was taking a picture of...the post office counter. 

And that's the story of how I failed as a human being, and didn't get my picture taken will Bill in the post office. Good news is I came out of that experience with this gem of a picture. 
Bill Little Couple

Happy Friday!
Have you ever had a celebrity encounter? And yes, TLC stars 100% count. 
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October 19, 2016

remember when

When I first started this blog back in 1997 (just kidding. But sometimes it does feel that long. Except no one would ever want to read eight-year old Emily's thoughts), I really just started this because I like to write. I like to write, I like to tell stupid, silly stories, and so one day Yippee! It's MLE was born and brought home from the hospital so that I could write down those stupid, silly stories.

Fast forward to 2016, and I feel like stupid-stories-telling-Emily has turned into Emotional Emily. Each and every time I come to this space I am word vomming lots of feelings onto your screen. How's that for a visual? 

Now, if you thought I was saying all of that to let you know I've feasted on ginger ale and saltines so that my word voms are gone then...I'm terribly sorry. I will still be word vomming on you today. I just wanted you to know that I know that you know I've become quite emotional lately. You know?
This past week and weekend we were traveling all over our old Charleston and Atlanta stomping grounds to celebrate some of our best friends getting married. About two years ago the Board of the Freddie and Emily's Friends Group had a meeting, and decided they all would be getting married within the next twenty to twenty-four months. Because of this decision, Freddie and I have had to step up into our new roles as professional wedding goers/bridal party people. As absolutely as insane as it has been to travel all over for so many weddings lately, I would not trade it for anything. Not even for a Dairy Queen blizzard which is something I cannot stop thinking about lately. That's how for serious I am. Looking back on these recent wedding fills me to the very tip of the brim with happiness and love. Weddings are such a joyous occasion, but they become quadruple to the max joyous when it is some of your absolute, without a doubt, been my friend for way too long, remember-when-you-wore-blue-mascara closest friends getting married. Every single time I turn into the sap from the biggest sugar maple tree you ever did see.

And this past wedding week was no exception. Throughout our travels we passed our first home together in Charleston, and all the places we used to spend our time as newlyweds. We ate at the same restaurants. We drove down the same streets. We shopped at the same Target (hashtag priorities). As if that wasn't enough for my overflowing-with-sap heart, we then traveled to Atlanta where we passed our old houses there. The houses we lived in when we were first dating and so in lurve. We passed the wine bar where Ricky took me the night he proposed. We passed some of the old places I used to teach dance back in the day. Day after day felt like walking down memory lane, and I. Loved. Every. Step. Of. It.

That's pretty much all I wanted to say... that and I think you should go take a walk down memory lane sometime soon, too. Whether that means flipping through a photo book you ordered with a 50%  off Snapfish coupon, but have never opened it once since getting it in the mail.

Or if that means stalking yourself on Facebook, and looking through all the pictures in which you've been tagged.

Maybe it means taking five seconds out of your day to stop and remember your favorite fall memory.

Or your favorite winter memory.

Or your favorite memory from any season.

Or maybe it's taking ten seconds to remember that one time you got the best hug of your life.

Or! Or or! The best kiss of your life.

Maybe it's cleaning out an old box and finding letters or cards.

It might even be driving a little bit out of the way on the way home just to pass a special place.

Whatever it is. Stop for a second. Remember for a second. Smile for a second (or two!). Because life is too short to forget the good stuff.

October 12, 2016

honey please

Well folks, just like that the TexAnn trip is over. Time is such a silly thing, and until someone invents a life remote control where I can click "slo-mo" on all events, I'll just be over here whining about how fast time flies. 

Every time I leave family or family leaves me I feel like I need to write some ginormously juicy and sappy post about how much family means to me, and why everyone needs to have their family. Their people. Their support group. And why everyone needs to hug on and kiss on and sometimes annoy the crap outta those people. 

However I'll spare you all my roller coaster of post-sister visit emotions and stick with something a little less emo (as the 2000's kids called it). 

Sidebar: I will say the highlight of the sister trip may have been when my friend Rachel, Ann, and I harmonized Bitch Better Have My Money, and sang it acapella style for our bartender. We are waiting for our record deal from that exchange. Or at least a free cocktail. Either one will do. 

Anyways, let's talk about something really important. Like really, really important.

Your skin. The skin on your face, to be exact. I've mentioned a few times here recently that my skin look horrendous lately. The phrase pizza face was not created because seeing a pimply face made one crave pizza. I think, in fact, that when you see a face covered in zits, a pizza face, that you want any food other than pizza. This is me warning you not to look at my face anytime soon if you are wanting to eat pizza in the near future. 

My sister has the facial skin of the butt of an angel doll baby. That is as smooth, fresh, and clean as her face looks at all times. I couldn't wait to get her secrets. Spoiler alert: she has no secrets. No, I take that back. Her secret is that her selfless, humble older sister took all the bad genes and left only beauty and grace for her. Insert smirk emoji right HERE. Three or four of 'em. 

Emily, I brought the honey mask!
We have to do the honey mask.
Let's do the honey mask!

These were phrases I heard Ann exclaim several times at the beginning of her trip. I passed it off because A) honey sounds sticky and something I only want on my pb sandwiches, and B) we were too busy exploring to stop and mask it up.

Have you ever gotten a really bad sunburn? And then gotten really excited to peel that really bad sunburn? If you are grossed out by the thought of peeling sunburn then stop reading this blog right here, and also maybe stop being my blog friend because HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE PEELING SUNBURN?! There is something so satisfying about peeling a giant chunk of skin off. Right? Right. Almost as satisfying as watching Medusa peel off her fake eyelashes in The Rescuers, but we can talk about fake eyelashes later.

Back to honey masks

Holy. All. Things. That. Are. Glorious. I cannot believe Ann didn't make me do this mask the SECOND we got back from the airport because it is 100% like peeling off sunburn.

And it is 100% satisfying. And 100% fun. And 100% something you should do.
Ann also 100% approved this picture to be on my blog. Not. 

Jury is still out on the magical zit-be-gone powers of it, but I will say that my skin, zits and all, felt almost as smooth as that angel doll baby's butt skin I mentioned earlier. Almost. 

This post is in no way sponsored, but Hey! Hey Honey! It should be! Because I screamed the most exciting screams as I peeled your mask offa my face. Over and out. 

October 7, 2016

TexAnn

By the end of the day I will (hopefully) be sipping on some wine and snuggling on the couch with my SISTER.

My sister! My younger-but-looks-older-and-is-the-coolest-human-ever sister is coming to big, bad Texas. Now I'm not quite sure what we will be doing seeing as the main things to do in Houston all revolve around eating, and my coolest human being of a sister is the world's pickiest eater...

Although who in his or her right mind wouldn't literally turn into the heart eyes emoji after tasting a fresh, Tex-Mex, melt-in-your-mouth tortilla?? Who?? Hopefully all of you are not in your right minds because that just means more tortillas for me. 

I digress...

In honor of today being National Emily's Sister Is Coming Into Town Day I thought it was only fitting that today's post be about my sister, too. Enter Five Reasons My Sister Is The Coolest. 

1) She takes and posts selfies like this and can actually get away with it. 
Meanwhile my selfie album is filled with gems like this...

2) She's the itty bitty baby of the family which means she's the brunt of most of the jokes. I will say 99.9999% of the time she brings it on herself. However 99.9999% of the time she's also a good sport about everyone poking fun of her, and even calls herself out before we/I get a chance. 

On that note, Ann has the handwriting of a five-year old trying to learn to write while their pet dog, Greta the Great Dane, is constantly nudging their arm and knocking them over. But she owns it.

Exhibit A:
circa 2014 in a birthday card from her to me. 

3) As seen in #1, she chopped off all of her hair for the second time in the past three years, and pulls it off better than Ted Mosby's red cowboy boots. HIMYM shout-out, anyone? Anyone?

4) When I say Ann is the youngest I mean the yoooooungest. In this instance, that many o's means she is almost six years younger than I am, and almost nine years younger than my brother. This meant she spent a lot of her childhood around our older friends which meant we were the nicest siblings and made her into our own little dress up doll. 
Meet Troy Bolton from High School Musical. I mean, Ann Bolton. I mean, my sister. 

5) She became obsessed with Lord of the Rings at an early age. Now, you might be thinking Emily! LOTR! That does not make her cool! It makes her #nerdalert!  To that I say...well, you are right. But she taught herself some Elvish and once upon a time three years ago she really, really wanted to come to Charleston to spend New Year's with me and Ricky when we lived there. Naturally we made her life more fun by insisting that she was not allowed to come until she spoke Elvish to us. 
She did it. She came to Chucktown for NYE in 2013. She's the nerdiest coolest. 

And now you know a bunch of random facts about a person you will probably never even meet. Which is your loss. So thanks (mom and dad) for reading this whole post!

Ann, get yer booty on that plane and come see these stars at night.

Happy Friday!

October 5, 2016

currently: the summer fall edition

This past weekend Houston gave us a taste of fall. It was glorious. The air felt nippy, the sun was shining, and my cardigan felt so nice against my non-sweaty arms. I couldn't believe it. Cooler weather, what! As I smiled with the kind of joy that only fall can bring, I happened to look down at my car thermometer. It read 83 degrees

83 degrees. That was our fall preview. That's what felt cool

And this is the story of how Texas and it's 106+ temperatures ruined me. 

Other than thinned out Texas blood, let's talk about what else is currently going on...
cheer-sing //
This time next week we'll be in my favorite place in the world getting ready for the wedding of some of my favorite people in the world. If you guessed Charleston as the place, you win ten gold stars. If you guessed that I'll be drinking champagne cocktails from Rarebit, you win twenty gold stars. If you guessed Andy and Katie as the people getting married, you win all the gold stars.

organizing //
My life. And by that I mean the guest bedroom closet, but don't you feel like your life is being organized when you clean out a cluttered drawer or closet or space? Yes? Good.

dreaming //
...of a white Christmas. That isn't gonna happen, but since I typed that, all I can think about is Christmas. So I'm dreaming of where I can put the Christmas tree in our apartment, and when I can walk up and down the Christmas aisles at Hobs Lobs without feeling like a lunatic (full disclosure: I walked down one Christmas aisle last week at the HL).

buying //
You now all know my deep, dark secret of having a pizza face. The beauty of blogging is that you don't have to see my face in real time so you didn't know I was suffering from the acne of a pubescent, sweaty 13-year old girl. At post-puberty, slightly sweaty 27-years old. No, I am not buying a new face. Yes, I am buying new concealer. No, I have no idea which concealer to get. Yes, I need all your recommendations. Thanks, Google friends.

listening //
I've only mentioned this two times on the blog, but if you've seen me in real life recently, then I've probably mentioned it two times two hundred times. Go listen to My Favorite Murder podcast right now. There's a fair amount of cursing, but if you like true crime and humor, then stop reading my blog and start listening to their podcast. Cover your ears if the bad words offend you, but uncover your ears for some of the craziest crime stories ever.

What have you been up to currently?
Linking up with Anne and Jacqui.